Here are some of the common myth that people have about men. Income, competition, greed, success, influence, women, status, debt: these all play a role in defining the numerous, widespread perceptions of the modern male and his seemingly unending pursuit of professional happiness. Of the scores of male myths, how many are accurate? How many are holdovers from another era? And how many of these male myths have to do with power and money? Enter the Great Male Survey, AM’s bold attempt to paint a complete picture of the modern man. And no picture is complete without an examination into the myths and perceptions surrounding his career, finances and professional motives.
Number 10
Men work for income alone
It’s a quandary that only a handful of men will face in their lifetimes: Would you quit your job if you won the lottery? A survey of posts and responses across the web suggests that most men would, but some conditions come up. The amount of the winnings is one, since no one in his right mind would quit a steady job with benefits for a $50,000 jackpot. However, opinions change when the amount creeps into seven figures. There are other factors involved, such as what to do with your time and making smart investment choices.
While it’s all a daydream for most, the issue raises the question of why a man works at his job to begin with. Is it a male myth that men work for income alone or does the work fulfill him?
Number 9
Men fear gold diggers
Gold diggers present a very old psychological concern for men who have worked hard for their power and money.
Men don’t need to look far to be convinced that gold diggers are on the prowl, as society and pop culture offer numerous examples, from Kanye West’s “Gold Digger” and web sites like SugarDaddyForMe.com to trophy wives and high-profile divorces in which the previously low- or average-income ex-wife walks away with some of his millions.
Number 8
Most men feel overworked and underpaid
At some point during the 20th century, the term “nine to five” connoted traditional business hours. Next came eight to five or nine to six, stretching the work day to nine hours with an unpaid lunch. For many, hours have extended in both directions, but the pay hasn’t seemed to keep up.
Couple that with the pace of the world: Stores began to stay open 24 hours and the web arrived, and suddenly, around the clock, the entire world was up and hungry. Is it any wonder men might feel this way?
Number 7
Men are always the perpetrators of sexual harassment
If women feel they can’t report sexual harassment for fear of retaliation or a lack of legal recourse, imagine how a man must feel. After all, we live in a macho society, so stepping forward as a man and claiming you’ve been sexually harassed remains somewhat taboo. Couple this belief with the notion that a man would enjoy being sexually harassed.
Although federal laws clearly state that both sexes are possible victims, the support network for male victims is scant and the huge majority of precedent-setting court cases feature men as the aggressors, leading many to believe that it’s always men behind sexual harassment, and never women.
Number 6
American men plan poorly for retirement
At least one reward ought to come from a lifetime spent working, and that is the ability to retire in relative comfort. Thus the perception that American men do not plan adequately for retirement is troubling, if it’s true.
Social Security may mislead many men into believing they have nothing to worry about when they retire, but the U.S. Department of Labor claims less than half of Americans even crunch the numbers to be certain. Meanwhile, public policy experts say that in the future, Social Security will pay less and less.
Number 5
Men crave status symbols
In the booming 1980s it wasn’t uncommon to see a bumper sticker that read, “He who dies with the most toys wins.” This was a sentiment that expressed a desire to compete against others by flaunting one’s wealth through various status symbols, including everything from homes and cars to boats and even trophy wives.
The perception is that men don’t live for their individual interests, but for outdoing or one-upping another man in their shared interests. In short, men have traditionally defined themselves through inconspicuous consumption.
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Number 4
Men fear public speaking
Public speaking is frequently reported as the No. 1 phobia among American adults. Thus, ranking higher than the likes of death are concerns over exhibiting any sign of anxiety or incompetence, such as trembling, a quivering voice, forgetting something, looking like a fool, failing to finish a presentation, or sounding unintelligible.
Behind this perception are questions of self-confidence and personal image, suggesting that men (the bearers of strong outward personas) may be concealing very real, but very basic and very treatable social phobias. The irony is that most men associate these traits with women.
Number 3
American men are saddled with credit card debt
In 2002, American Consumer Credit Counseling reported that U.S. credit card debt had topped $60 billion, and that the average American owed around $9,000 on his credit cards. You would find in excess of 1.2 billion credit cards in the wallets of North Americans, and these companies flood mailboxes with credit card offers that most people can’t afford.
These figures are frequently reported, and they suggest that Americans are fiscally irresponsible. However, these figures are disputed; others claim that many Americans — as many as one-quarter — don’t even own credit cards, and that the average balance carried by those who do is not more than $2,000.
Number 2
Men compete against one another financially
Young men are quick to boast about their new salaries, while billionaires are always building the bigger, more elaborate house. Men compete, that’s what we do.
Like the perception that men crave status symbols, there is a related perception that, with regard to incomes, men are in fierce competition with one another. The question then becomes: How much personal self-esteem does a man derive from his income? While at least one study found a correlation between self-esteem and income, the result was not what one might expect: As income levels rose, self-esteem levels fell.
Number 1
Money primarily motivates men in their professional lives
It’s hard to ignore the bottom line, but men are perceived as following the money — even if it means spending long hours doing work that doesn’t appeal to them. While money itself, and the status and power it carries, may be motivating enough for some, others may have personal or economic reasons, like a family to support or a preferred lifestyle to live.
The perception is highlighted by the occasional inspirational story of a man who “had it all” and gave it up to do charity work or lead a simpler life when he realized that money was not enough.
understanding the modern man
Long-held public perceptions, like stereotypes, often begin with an assertion that rings so close to the truth that people can’t help but embrace it. As time goes on, the perceptions tend to persist even if they no longer seem remotely accurate.
AM’s ambitious Great Male Survey seeks to determine where these perceptions belong: in the trash with other myths or a representative place within the modern man.